Break your crown already, Jack.

Adam Sandler as Jill

Sometimes I get emails for advanced movie screenings, probably because I've purchased tickets on Fandango or Movie Tickets in the past and didn't click on the right button when I created the account that would spare me from annoying spam. However, every once in awhile a gem might sneak through and maybe, just maybe, I'll get a chance to go to a sneak preview of a new Marvel or DC superhero movie or some comedy that might actually be funny. Most of the time, though, I get invitations to things like Fright Night 3D or Jack and Jill starring Adam Sandler.

No, really. This is something that exists:

Everything was going great in Jack's life, until the most annoying person in the world came to visit....His twin sister, Jill. Come see the comedy event of the season, as Adam Sandler plays both Jack and Jill.

A little bit of web-fu on my part revealed this HIGH-LARIOUS picture of Adam Sandler in drag, so it's not like this is some joke invite that serves as a set-up in order to get me on a reality show or something.

Additionally, Katie Holmes plays Sandler's love interest which continues a theory of mine I like to call the Sliding Sandler Sweetheart Scale...because alliteration is awesome. The theory states that for each year that Adam Sandler gets older, more out-of-shape and/or uglier, his love interests in his films get younger, fitter and more attractive. Now, granted, Katie Holmes throws this trend off just a little bit, but every other movie, culminating in the recent and abysmal Just Go With It neatly falls into this phenomenon. Someone with better Excel skills could create an impressive chart detailing this idea; sadly, that person isn't me. Also, the theory only applies to Adam Sandler comedies, not his dramatic work that usually ranges from passable (Spanglish) to quite good (Punch-Drunk Love).

Frosh
On Monday, you took a quiz on the first three chapters of To Kill a Mockingbird. Scout's first day of school is an even better introduction to the social politics of small town Maycomb than the exposition heavy first chapter. Remember Walter Cunningham and the details of the discussion between him and Atticus as those will come up later on in the story. We began reading through chapter four after that. By Thursday, you need to be finished with chapter five for a quiz that covers those two chapters.

Tuesday (and, as I look into the future for fourth period, Wednesday) was the first day of STAR testing. Make sure you get a good night's rest and a substantive breakfast before each testing day. It's good to do that each day, but studies have shown that those two things play a big part in your performance on these kinds of tests. Third period received the Themes Worksheet and the Thesis Assignment. Fourth period will get them tomorrow.

Seniors
You received time on Monday to work on your group discussion questions for section one of One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest. We then discussed section one at length. Let me reiterate that this first section of the book is, by far, the most difficult. The tedium of the fourth chapter in particular is difficult to finish, but it's there by design. Without it, there's no way to tell how much of an impact McMurphy makes on Chief and the ward as a whole.

After finishing the discussion on Tuesday (and, again, Wednesday for sixth period), you began reading chapter four of Tom Wolfe's The Electric Kool Aid Acid Test titled "What Do You Think of My Buddha?" which details Ken Kesey's introduction to the counterculture movement. There are eight questions at the end of the chapter which will be due on Thursday at the end of the (shortened) period.